THE END OF THE WORLD

I just realized that if in fact this is the last day the world will exist as we know it......how will I ever find an orthodontist to take these things off of me in the new-world Zombie order?

CHECKPOINT 1: THE NEW BAND So I had my first check-up a couple of days ago. Things are right on schedule apperantly. My orthodontist asked me how long it took me to forgive him for doing this horrible thing to me and I told him--and honestly so--that it took a full week. Truthfully, for what is a blog but a dump site for untethered honesty, I was never mad at him, but at me. I was so pissed at myself for waiting this long. Yes of course, this is the right thing to do, so why the heck did it take me so long to do it? This new band that he put in is killing me. I'm back to only eating foods I can just gum down with only the use of my tongue. Also, where my other band was white and less noticable, this one is thick and straight silver. It's like he started me out with a less shocking device so I got used to it, then slowly but surely, is turning me into the nerd these things were meant for. So far, I've been able to resist the nerdiness...at least in public. But it is a force to be reckoned with....This band is supposed to widen my teeth, giving me the awesome puffy lips I've always dreamed of. So far, it's just given me giant headaches and chopped up my tongue something awful. I just keep telling myself it's worth it. It's worth it. It's worth it. In good news, I got another comercial spot that this time, I was able to go to! Yay! Take that braceface!!

I am so DONE WITH THESE THINGS........

I am SO done with these things.......

I am so done with these things......

GIVING THANKS I haven't posted for a week or so because really, each day has been filled with the same exacerbations: I am so done with these things! It's all I can do every day to NOT rip them off my teeth myself! I had a dream last night where the brackets all fell off while I was asleep, but because of how I was sleeping and that my teeth were so malable, they moved to be even worse than when I got them on in the first place. But the braces were off.....it was wonderful :) It's hard for me to believe that I'll need to keep these things on for another 7 months! They're already so straight! Really, another month would probably do it, and then what? Six months of holding them in place? Isn't that what a retainer is for? Ugh. At this point, being thankful for these things teeters on the edge of "my teeth weren't that bad to begin with" and "they are going to look amazing once this is all over!" I'll tell you what I am grateful for: a friggin sense of humour. I think I would have crumbled by now if I couldn't wake up every day a laugh at the 32 year old with braces in the mirror. Sill girl. Braces are for kids!

Locking Lips, or The Ex Part II .....Yeah.....So as it turns out, kissing with braces is not as painful as I thought it would be. The damage ended up being strictly emotional. I don't know why I go back to this guy. I don't know why I kissed him again. I had a good streak going! It just ended up being the perfect way to end the night. He called me up out of the blue and wanted to have dinner at our favorite sandwich place. Since I've only recently been able to eat sandwiches again, I jumped at the chance. We hadn't seen or talked to each other in a while. Apperantly he's getting Lasik soon which means he has to wear glasses for many weeks before hand. So there we were. Him with his coke bottle glasses, and me with my braces at our sadwhich place, laughing at each other's new-found nerdiness. Most people opt for a spray tan or new diet after a break-up, we both decided to take our post-break-up transformation in a different direction.....me and my 8 month long cocoon. I asked him if there were any other girls in his life and he said something about not needing any when he's got such a "beautiful braced" girl to go back to. How was I supposed to NOT kiss him after a statement like that?? Of course I knew it was only a one time, for old time's sake, love 'em and leave 'em fling! And of course I don't want to go back to what we had left at the end of the relationship! But man it felt nice to feel attractive again! Sexy even! But of course, by the time the door closed and I watched him walk to his car, I was kicking myself for falling backwards...again. More than anything, I got these stupid things so that I could move FORWARD in life. So that I could make changes that would lead to accomplishing life-long goals and happiness! He's a comfort blanket. And braces are anything but comfortable.